Paranoia+little sleep= bad things in my head

My brain won't go to sleep, so this is what you get. Harold is trying to get my attention by licking the keyboard and my hand. This would have been cuter before he killed and ate a bird. Puppy kisses just don't have the same affect as they used to.

For some reason my life is kind of amazing right now. Whenever it gets to this point I get a little anxious. I start to doubt everything I do and then I get all paranoid. Granted, it is not perfect, but amazing.

One thing that has come up into my life and I feel as if it will happen again is the gaping hole called the "Friend Zone."

So, I have troubles when I start talking to guys that they automatically assume we are friends. So, so many times this has happened. I don't mind having friends. I have friends. Two. I just want someone to want me as more than just friends. I will have to find sound advice on this because so far I just sprint into the zone and wait in there.

What typically happens in my poor excuses for a love life is that I will develop a crush (love that feeling). Then I will hang out with this person. We will start doing all sorts of things together, I fall in like, I tell him that I would like to date him, he says he "doesn't think of me that way," I cry (I'm not weak, I'm human), I grow strong and get over it and the vicious cycle starts back up again. I would love to stop.

This current guy I'm talking to I would love to keep out of that zone. I was even thinking about getting a T-shirt that says so. You can get one here . Thank you zazzle.

There has to be some kind of repellant for that. In the mean time, I will just wait and see what happens.

I was with him the other night and he called me by my name. My full name. Meshelle. NO one does that. Mainly it is because everyone butchers my name except for my family. I love my name, I just want it said right. He said it right and boy does it sound right in an accent. (if for some reason you found my blog and are now embarrassed because you are reading about yourself, sorry about that) It totally caught me off guard and I think I had a really shocked look on my face because he asked about what I go by. (if again you have found my blog, please feel free to call me by my full name, it's great to hear) Every man should have an accent.

One thing that has made my life amazing in the last little bit is the wonderful joy of new found fun. This fun has come in the form of working at a salon. I work just  about 10 hours a week and still full-time teaching. I love it. I love to get my hands in there and have fun. I have only worked for one week, but I absolutely love it. I work with the best team in the world.

Well, that's enough. I am tired now and I think my brain will shut off for just a few moments in order for me to sleep.

I made dinner last night.

Seared Chicken with Avocado

(I couldn't take a picture of what I did because I had company over, but this is a picture of the same recipe)
(ps this cookbook is amazing)

11/2 tsp. blackened seasoning
4 (4 oz.) skinless, boneless chicken breast halves
1 tsp. olive oil
1 diced peeled avocado
2 Tbsp. chopped fresh cilantro
1 jalapeño pepper, seeded and finely chopped
2 Tbsp. fresh lime juice (about 1 lime)
1/4 tsp. salt
1 lime cut into fourths

Sprinkle seasoning on both sides of chicken. Heat oil on high. Add chicken to pan. Cook 1 min on each side. Reduce heat to medium; cook 3 min. on each side or until lightly browned.

Combine, avocado, cilantro, pepper, lime juice and salt. Squeeze lime over each piece of chicken before serving. Serve with avocado mixture. I also served it with zucchini and couscous.

Word to the wise: When stabbing the pit of an avocado to get it out, do not stab like you are trying to hurt someone. Stab flat. I may or may not have severed a nerve and/or stabbed the bone of my middle finger while taking the pit from an avocado the other day. I still don't have the feeling back in it and when I press on my tiny wound it sends tingles up my finger. No worries, those things grow back right? Good times.

Suck it.